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PostPosted: Mon Jun 29, 2009 2:40 pm 
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To echo Face, I'm definitely enjoying the J&J interactions, even if Jenna is surly and gradually slipping closer and closer to becoming a horrible Sith Lady bound to end locked in combat with her own father!

I recall picking up a hint that Red was married a while back... now I can't remember if it was in here or in the plot itself! I'll try and hunt it down at some point. ;) I enjoyed the family reunion, and as the father of a young daughter I found Octavia's good-night with Tavi very touching.

As usual, great work!

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PostPosted: Mon Jun 29, 2009 3:02 pm 
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As I have said many times before, I am in awe as to how well you've nailed Red - and I love someone else giving a place for her family/backstory to come forward!

:D

I agree with Dru on the matter of Jenna and Jaden, as well - the developments with darkness and the pair are really keeping me on edge.

Not to mention these next phases!!?!?! Kudos, for wonderful writing as always! :)

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PostPosted: Sat Aug 01, 2009 1:37 pm 
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OK, I'll get the obvious stuff out the way first...

I LOVE all the Face, Jaden, Wraith stuff! Loved the Falcon and Sacul flying together, loved the "Face is only one step behind Thrawn" bit, loved the Face/Jaden interaction... Basically I loved it all!

In fact, once I've typed this, I'm going back to read it again!

Loved Dru/Lyn too and loved the action sequences!

The only minor niggle... No Red! But I guess we can't have too much of a good thing!

Did I mentioned I loved it?


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PostPosted: Sat Aug 01, 2009 2:09 pm 
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Well, only reason theres no Red is because all the action is taking place on the same day as the previous part and with the times I'm working on, it's currently nightime on Tatooine.

Red will soon feature again soon :D

Glad you liked, expect more Face/Jaden and Falcon/Sacul in the next part. :wink:

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PostPosted: Sun Aug 02, 2009 8:52 am 
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As always, great writing! I loved the sort of jumping sets of family reunions and then the splitting back up into groups to go after Jenna.

And I suppose Red can't be in every plot :wink:

But a great follow up and reveal for this line with Jenna! I am so looking forward to more of the story and finding out what happens from the lightsaber duel. Also? Daddy Deven probably isn't going to be too happy about this guy...

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PostPosted: Mon Aug 03, 2009 2:15 pm 
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I really enjoyed the Falcon/Sacul bits; the groups seem to work quite well together, and I'm definitely looking forward to your promise of more! ;) I'm interested to see a bit more on your take of Han Solo in an action scene, which I expect will be readily forthcoming. :)

Also, I loved Lyn's introspection, and enjoyed Dru's bungling his handling of the situation. ;) I will vouch that it is true to life that you could manipulate the most practiced businessman and still fumble with your kids, and thought it a nice touch! Definitely anxious to see this arc continue. :)

As usual, a bang-up job all 'round!

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PostPosted: Tue Aug 11, 2009 12:21 pm 
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Double-post ACKSHUN!!

I have to say I thought the Jenna/Jennir fight sequence moved really well. I want to read it again, to see what I missed, because it felt like it had the sort of depth that is revealed on a second reading, but it easily had the flow to draw you along the fight. Very well done, I thought.

I also enjoyed the further adventures of Horn, Tarn, Loran & Loran, as well as seeing the greater Solo company in action.

As usual, looking forward to more!

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PostPosted: Wed Aug 12, 2009 1:18 am 
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I shall Echo Mr Kargin's sentiments! Loved the lightsaber battle! It felt like that's how lightsaber battles SHOULD be written, so kudos!

H,K,L & L were also entertaining, and I really liked your Leia POV too. I liked how the abrupt change in pace really highlighted the section, without dragging the whole plot to a standstill. Nice! Oh, and I loved the Wraith. The swooshing red sensor bar was a welcomed addition. Especially to people of our TV generation! ;)

Looking forward to more!


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PostPosted: Wed Aug 12, 2009 11:12 am 
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Loran and Loran? Sounds like a Father and Son furniture removal business. :D

Working on the next part now. :wink:

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PostPosted: Sat Sep 26, 2009 5:47 am 
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Deven Tarn wrote:
Working on the next part now. :wink:


Work harder!


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PostPosted: Sat Sep 26, 2009 10:52 am 
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The Face wrote:
Deven Tarn wrote:
Working on the next part now. :wink:


Work harder!



Ok :P

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PostPosted: Sat Sep 26, 2009 3:39 pm 
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Damn! That's fast work!

Excellent stuff as usual! Really enjoyed seeing Piggy and Red again! It was also good to see Hales again. Maybe he could come with us? :-)

Great stuff!


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 30, 2009 7:16 am 
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Sorry to take so long to read -

LOVED it! :D The little bits and pieces with Red's family were spot on. You've nailed her parents, and I love the constant formality by Piggy, knowing Red doesn't want a big deal of it in this situation.

The progression on Jaina's condition and foresight by Luke were awesome, and the Face-Halley conversations equally insightful. Can't wait to see the coming battles (well, maybe....it does mean folks die :( )

kudos!

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 06, 2009 3:40 pm 
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Great stuff, Deven! I get the feeling that there's a lot of foreshadowing going on,e ven when it's not as explicit as Skywalker having a vision of the future. ;) I really enjoyed the interactions; I feel like you've only improved on your ability to convey the feelings of the speakers and the tone of the conversation without compromising the storytelling at all.

Once again, great work!

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PostPosted: Sun Jan 17, 2010 6:11 am 
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Ok, after almost four months delay due to me starting a new job, a new part has been posted.

Enjoy.

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PostPosted: Sun Jan 17, 2010 8:12 am 
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Firstly, congrats on the new job. Whatcha up to now then?

Secondly... Awesome plot! LOVED the dream sequence, and the mirrors. Fantastic idea! Of course, as always loved the Jaden/Wraith bits! Glad to see that they still have their healthy attitude towards correct procedure! :) And another Wraith joins the fray! Can't keep 'em down!

Good stuff as always! :)


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 20, 2010 11:36 am 
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To echo Face, I was a huge fan of the dream sequence. You captured a lot of what makes dreams dreamy, I think. I particularly liked the complete shift the dream took when she made it lucid; very reminiscent of my own experience!

I'm looking forward to seeing the eventual destination of the Liberty District arc, and of course am enjoying the continuing Wraith storyline! I believe I felt a lot of foreshadowing in this one. ;)

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 14, 2010 11:43 am 
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Finally :lol: , enjoy, more soon, :D

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PostPosted: Thu Jul 15, 2010 5:40 am 
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Weeeeeeeeee! Awesome stuff as per usual. Loving the infiltration, kinda reminded me of Iron Man suits.

More sooner next time please!


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PostPosted: Thu Jul 15, 2010 7:04 am 
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Very cool - you have a lot going on, and its rather impressive (and convenient) to have it all broken down in small chunks. I can't wait to see who the Dapper Gentleman is - more, more, more story!

:)

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PostPosted: Thu Jul 15, 2010 4:41 pm 
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Yeah, took a while. :) Had a lot on my plate the last few months.

Working on the next part now, which will be in a smaller, easier to swallow chunk.

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PostPosted: Fri Jul 16, 2010 7:31 am 
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Hmm, interesting! Like Red, I think you're doing an impressive job of keeping so much going on at once yet presenting it in a manner that flows and is straightforward enough to remember most of the relevant details from one posting to the next. ;) Definitely looking forward to more!

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PostPosted: Sat Jul 17, 2010 1:36 pm 
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Oh, liked the Taggart by the way!


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PostPosted: Mon Jul 19, 2010 6:58 am 
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Wow...heck of a way to start of the new book - I foresee lots and lost of battles. Also, meeting up with the old Wraiths, while Red definitely would be disappointed to miss the main battle, would be a great chance to be around her old friends (be it remote) and get a second shot at that large ship from the first battle!

Very well written, and looking forward to more, Deven!

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PostPosted: Mon Jul 19, 2010 7:24 am 
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Wow, wow, wow, wow, wow....

You get the general idea!


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PostPosted: Mon Jul 19, 2010 7:31 am 
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The Face wrote:
Wow, wow, wow, wow, wow....

You get the general idea!



I believe I do :lol:

Glad you guys are still following the fun despite the multi-month gap.

Next part hopefully, by the end of the week. Beyond that can't be more specific, gonna be really busy with moving into my new place.

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PostPosted: Thu Jul 22, 2010 2:43 pm 
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Y'know... I prefer this to the actual canon!


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PostPosted: Thu Dec 30, 2010 8:35 am 
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*pokes* More?


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 02, 2011 6:28 pm 
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Hehe, yeah I think its time.

Between work and dealing with some big life changing decisions as well as moving into my own place, I've been a bit lax with working on this.

Pace should start picking up now though.

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PostPosted: Mon Jan 03, 2011 10:10 am 
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Well worth the wait! And am I the only one incredibly nervous about Jenna being off her medication?

Not good, I tell you!

On the other hand, I find myself incredibly intrigued by the secret mission that has the Wraiths (in their various roles) all away from what appears to be an incoming slaughter on Couruscant. The tension rises!

Kudos, Deven - and understandable that life makes writing difficult. But I look forward to even more, now!

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PostPosted: Tue Jan 04, 2011 4:05 am 
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Wow! I should have poked a lot earlier!

The worst thing is... even if our heroes were at Coruscant, the scale of everything is just too damned big for even US to be effective!

The tension is mounting awesomely Deven... nice stuff!


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PostPosted: Sun Mar 06, 2011 8:33 pm 
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So many things, so many! I am in suspense waiting to see what the Wraiths find/interrupt and if it will be in time to deal with the REAL plan!

OMG! :D

Yes, I just did that. Well written, Dev!

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PostPosted: Mon Mar 07, 2011 2:36 am 
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Weeeee! Excellent stuff as per usual! The tension is mounting.... explosions are booming...

What is Trinity planning? Why are Jania and co walking into a trap? How can Face have such artfully mused hair whilst bald? We need answers dammit!


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PostPosted: Mon Mar 21, 2011 8:07 pm 
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Pssst, Red... D'ya think if we keep bugging Deven, he'll post the next bit sooner?


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PostPosted: Tue Mar 22, 2011 6:32 am 
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OOh, I say let the bugging begin! ;)

Oh, Deeeeeveeeeeen. :)

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PostPosted: Thu Jul 07, 2011 3:13 pm 
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Y'all might have noticed I haven't been around much lately.

Life gets in the way sooooo much.....but it was probably worth waiting for :)

Hopefully, next part won't be so long a wait.

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PostPosted: Thu Jul 07, 2011 5:55 pm 
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Deven Tarn wrote:
Life gets in the way sooooo much.....


It does at that.


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PostPosted: Fri Jul 08, 2011 10:53 am 
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I LOVED the conversation between Red and Hertzog. Also, I am so creeped out by what is taking place in the ruins I have goosebumps.

Worth the wait as always, can't wait to see more!

Awesome writing!

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PostPosted: Mon Jul 11, 2011 12:53 pm 
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Great stuff as per usual there pal!

Like Red, I loved the Hertzog conversation, and the Sacul descriptions were beautifully done! Shame that she's going down.... again! :)


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PostPosted: Fri Jul 15, 2011 7:59 am 
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Great work as usual, Deven! I hate to be a part of the broken record here, but I also really enjoyed the Red/Hertzog interaction. It reminded me of old-timey wars when the armies would all line up, the commanders would go in and say "you want to not fight me?", and then they'd all get to fightin'. ;)

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PostPosted: Sun Sep 18, 2011 1:36 pm 
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Boo!!!!

Nyah! New part posted, just started writing and couldn't stop :)

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PostPosted: Mon Sep 19, 2011 1:29 am 
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Yey!

Loved the Italian Job reference btw!

Good stuff, as always... but must you always leave us wanting more? Actually, dumb question. MORE PLEASE!


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PostPosted: Mon Sep 19, 2011 6:12 pm 
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Glad you're still keeping up :D

I've wanted to do that Italian Job reference since like forever. So there we are.


Next part souldn't take to long. Going through a bad time and when that happens I knuckle down in writing to burn off frustration. So my pain is your gain....or something :lol:

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PostPosted: Sat Sep 24, 2011 5:34 am 
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Everything is just going down! There is a sinking feeling that the planet is set to explode in the pit of my stomach, but no one knows!

Love the references to the Italian job as well - wonderfully written as always and while I don't want you to suffer for us to get good writing, I cannot wait for the next piece!

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PostPosted: Sun Oct 23, 2011 7:44 am 
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Hooray for killing the core of the evil, half thing machine! Boo for evil, enraged Sith dude who wanted that toy alive....

Also, I began compulsively rubbing my arm at the "bone sticking out" moment for Red. The space battles both with Merciful Hand and at Coruscant do not seem to be doing well.

I'm waiting for the save the day Heroes to arrive. Wait...they're around there, and its messy. It's like its a real fight, with loss and all! :)

But fabulous writing, even if it was doom filled!

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PostPosted: Thu Dec 01, 2011 3:43 pm 
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A new part posted. Definitely approaching the big climax now :)

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 02, 2011 1:28 pm 
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Okay - OW! OW OW OW at Jenna's body. A very well written section, admittedly, if I am sitting here rubbing my face and ribs in empathy pain.

Also, someone has a LOT of explaining to do about the SSD that just appeared. But it is a friendly, so hooray!

Great writing as always. I am SO itching to see the end of this!

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PostPosted: Sat Dec 03, 2011 5:30 pm 
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Indeed, definitely a good bit of story! I know I'm lax about my commenting, but it's not for want of enjoyment, to be sure. As always, you've left me eager for more!

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PostPosted: Mon Dec 05, 2011 2:28 pm 
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I shall echo my comrades! A cracking addition! Always good to see Face in a scrap, and Jenna looks pretty damned beat up!

However, the best bit for me has to be Rrowv's final comment. Giggled out loud for that one! :)


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 10, 2012 3:14 pm 
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*Crawls from sick bed*

Here we go, new part....well, two new parts, t'was a long writing session hehe.

Now to go back to having bed flu or black death or Swine flu or foot and mouth or whatever it is I have.

:shock:

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PostPosted: Fri Feb 17, 2012 4:11 pm 
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First: Feel better! I hope are over whatever was plaguing you by now.

Second: Both parts were Excellent! The line with Deegan and burning skies (followed by the Obsidian code) fit the Neo Seps to a note in my mind. A horrible thing, but quite the ending for that group.

The jump from the explosion was also a wonderfully cinematic ending. I know you have more, but at this point I am a little sad things look to be done. I hope you come up with more, it has been very inspiring and well written.

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PostPosted: Sat Feb 18, 2012 2:15 am 
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I'm getting better, slow recovery here.

Yes, there's still more to come. Quite a bit actually, we've had the big end to the war, but there's the aftermath still to deal with and lots of little story ends to tie up.

I've still got more than a few surprises left :D

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PostPosted: Sun Feb 19, 2012 8:00 pm 
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Hooray, on all counts!

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PostPosted: Wed Feb 22, 2012 8:45 am 
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Excellent stuff as per usual! Although I read the second part before the first, because I am an idiot.

Still, glad there's more to come! :-D


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PostPosted: Sun May 13, 2012 11:08 am 
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Yet again, brilliant stuff!

Jaden and Jaina... YEY! GO ON MY SON! ;) (*edit* Especially as she's 8 years older than him!)

Looking forward to what Trinity is going to reveal, and looking forward to a Face/Han/Leia plot in the future!


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PostPosted: Mon May 14, 2012 3:32 pm 
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Very impressive how everything AFTER The massive 'battle finale' is more intriguing and suspense building than the battle itself!! Very well written as usual, and I appreciate that even as a General, Octavia is still bashful and mentally has moments of timidity, even if she forces through them now!

Great to see where everyone landed after the battle as well - fabulously written!

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PostPosted: Wed Jun 06, 2012 7:17 am 
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More to come :D

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PostPosted: Tue Jun 12, 2012 5:39 am 
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It's over? But, but... MORE!!!

Nice Lethal Weapon 4 quote btw. Very accurate!


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 12, 2012 7:23 am 
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Although, anyone else hoping for the Rogue and Wraith kids taking the Sacul for a spin 'round the galaxy?


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 12, 2012 8:06 am 
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The Face wrote:
It's over? But, but... MORE!!!


Hehe, at least one more part. Possibily two, still a lot of things to wrap up before the end :D


Quote:
Nice Lethal Weapon 4 quote btw. Very accurate!


Well spotted :)

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PostPosted: Thu Jun 14, 2012 3:35 pm 
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Its coming to a nice little tie up, but I have to admit I am also very, very sad at the end! Both retirements and the end of the storyline. It has been incredibly well written and SO fun to read!

As for the kiddos taking up the parent's role - I am sure a 7 year old Tavi can keep Sacul running, especially if she is anything like her mother! ;)

A wonderful piece - I liked the big Skye reveal, even if I had some suspicions that would be the case.

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PostPosted: Sun Sep 02, 2012 1:57 am 
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Hehe, I am still alive despite my best efforts (Top tip: Dropping kitchen knife on foot not fun). Hoping to get the next part out this week.

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PostPosted: Sun Sep 02, 2012 4:07 am 
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I hope there's a bit where Jaden meets the Solos! Especially if Face is there too!


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PostPosted: Sat Nov 17, 2012 2:52 pm 
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Hey look, turns out I am alive :D

Maybe not a Jaden meets Solos bit, but almost hehe.

edit: And yes, I iz aware that its two month since I said this part was just a week away. Grrrrr at life, grrrrrr.

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PostPosted: Sun Nov 18, 2012 2:48 am 
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As long as they keep coming, no complaints from us!

Nice Face/Han interaction... And Jaden checking out Jaina's bikini just makes me go "that's ma boy!"

Good stuff. :)


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PostPosted: Sun Nov 18, 2012 9:47 am 
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Life happens - and the part was well worth the wait!

Awesome descriptions of both side working out the new realities and while I am not overly girly about such things, EEEE proposal! Also, way to leave us hanging for the answer. :p

Well done as always!

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PostPosted: Sat Jan 26, 2013 11:12 am 
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Big post, big, big, big post.

May have got slightly carried away there. It's sorta the end there, but not quite. Just some epilogues I want to do to wind up characters and arcs completely. Sorta like quick short stories.

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PostPosted: Sat Jan 26, 2013 10:13 pm 
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Oh my gosh, it certainly didn't feel long - you broke it up very well and all of the sections flowed. Also, a huge props for bringing so many different lines together, that is not easy.

I have to admit, it is sad to think this is at the end! (even with the epilogue bits) - you certainly deserve a huge amount of kudos for such a massive project!

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PostPosted: Sun Jan 27, 2013 3:36 am 
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Firstly... My son is Tony Stark?!?! Awesome!

Secondly, I think you've wrapped everything up perfectly! It's a shame that it's over... but our characters can't keep going until their in their treble figures. I think you captured everyone at the end perfectly, Face the wandering nomad is never a way I thought he'd go... but somehow it fits.

Kudos sir!

Kudos.


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 27, 2013 12:49 pm 
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Anyone else mourning that it's over?


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 27, 2013 12:56 pm 
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Yes


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 27, 2013 1:01 pm 
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As said, I am sad that I will not have too many more to loo forward to reading - Guess I will just have to go back to the start and go through again!

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PostPosted: Tue Jan 29, 2013 7:08 am 
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Hehe, thanks everyone.

Just working on the prologues now. Just a series of self contained little stories that 'should' wrap up the last few loose ends, finish character arcs, and just give the characters one more run round the block.

After that I may just start work on the follow up. :wink:

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PostPosted: Tue Jan 29, 2013 7:34 am 
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:D

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PostPosted: Thu Jan 31, 2013 11:59 am 
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First two epilogues posted.

Just some little winding up stories. Covering a few post storyline events and winding up a couple of loose ends. Some short, some a bit long. Some will be completely self contained and some may link together. And we'll be bouncing around in time a bit too, from a few days after the end of the main story too a few years.

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PostPosted: Thu Jan 31, 2013 2:49 pm 
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Nice! I like the two little epilogue/epilogue-snippets you posted. I was also very pleased with myself for knowing who the Pilgrim was pretty early on, as well :)

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PostPosted: Fri Feb 01, 2013 10:04 am 
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Oh, Pilgrim was never in doubt! Not sure if he's lost himself, or was playing. Either works. :) Good stuff.


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 07, 2013 10:07 pm 
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Probably a little bit of both!

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PostPosted: Tue Feb 19, 2013 10:07 am 
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Another post! :D

Very deep thoughts from Leia regarding the evolving universe around her - I can appreciate the way she assessed Trinity v. Palpatine and the issues of the Republic "falling apart" after starting to show the same trends as the Old Republic. On a lighter note from that section, it sounds like Solo needs to drop the Falcon off on Tatooine for some repairs/maintenance ;)

I love the name the little Rakatan program gave itself. Also, I just about snorted my drink on its opinion: "And two, Gamorrrean poetry was terrible".

Sacul as a mom....that's a crazy concept, but I guess a fairly accurate one!

Enjoyable and well written as always!

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PostPosted: Tue Feb 19, 2013 11:35 am 
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Glad you're liking :D

I'm trying to keep these a little more 'bite sized' than the main story parts were. Generally aiming for two epilogues at a time.

Quote:
On a lighter note from that section, it sounds like Solo needs to drop the Falcon off on Tatooine for some repairs/maintenance ;)



Hmmmmmmm......... :wink:

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PostPosted: Wed Feb 20, 2013 4:14 am 
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Double thumbs up from me too!


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 22, 2013 6:47 am 
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I love how Rogue Squadron has become a self sustaining entity, even as the faces and vessels and universe changes - they still grieve the lost, they still crack jokes and form anew. It feels like a wonderful constant and I kinda really want to see more of the new group :)

Also, I got a huge amount of satisfaction in that schadenfreude kind of way over what happened to Viqi. Execution was too good, especially in Trinity Oslo-Tarn's mind, so it was awesome to see she got her revenge.

Lovely writing as always!

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PostPosted: Tue Mar 26, 2013 8:25 am 
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Writing the Viqi Shesh piece was difficult. Mostly in trying to keep things flowing, I had a lot of ideas for this bit that in practice just weren't working. Got there in the end though.

As for the Rogue piece. I just wanted to do a wrap up on them, since I hadn't actually mentioned them following the big final battle. An oversight there heehee.


Also, more for your delectation.

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PostPosted: Tue Mar 26, 2013 8:43 pm 
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I can appreciate how hard that probably was to write!

Hm, private army...I agree in suspecting Octavia is enjoying her retirement too much to go running around again, but who knows...maybe she can contract out repairs, at a good price of course, she has a clue on how much Jaden could afford! ;)

Very nice bit, as always!

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PostPosted: Thu Mar 28, 2013 3:15 am 
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On behalf of Jaden, I'd like to officially point out that Visage Enterprises is a publicly owned company, and the majority of the stock is owned through various charitable foundations, and trusts, and so forth. Look, it's all a bit technical, but the important thing is that Visage Enterpises is secure.

As for Janson... Classic genre mixing stuff!


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PostPosted: Mon May 13, 2013 4:41 pm 
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It's done, finished, the end, etc.

Really, really need to end this. The Epilogues were spinning out of control, need to move onto to next project. Work with some new characters. hehe.

It's a labour of love and I want a divorce. Or something.

Anyway, I'm so proud of The Darkest Days, hope everyones enjoyed it :D

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PostPosted: Wed May 15, 2013 6:22 pm 
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We salute you, sir. A fine accomplishment! :mrgreen:


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PostPosted: Thu May 16, 2013 7:17 am 
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You have EVERY Reason to be proud of this work!

I have to say, it was an amazing ride and you had me on the edge of my seat through the very end - and quite the ending!

If you do decide to jump into a new project, I am sure you will have us avidly following along once again! (Unless the star is Jar Jar the Sith lord...).

:D

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PostPosted: Sun May 26, 2013 9:27 am 
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Amazing! Absolutely amazing stuff! Kudos sir! What happened to Jaden in the end? Dru?

And you could always join the regular plot... ;)


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PostPosted: Thu Jun 06, 2013 9:29 am 
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Thanks everyone :D Had a nice break from the writing (Mostly due to managing to clock nearly a hundred hours of LOTRO in two weeks) But I've started work on my next epic.

Following on from the events of Darkest Days, with a significant time jump, and with an all new cast of characters. There'll be Jedi, blasters, stuff where all familiar with and stuff getting blown up. :D

As for Dru and Jaden.To be honest, I could be writing epilogues for another year, but also both Dru and Jaden will get a bit more coverage in my next storyline, though they won't actually feature, they will have had an influence on whats happened in the gap between stories.

Darth Jar Jar? I think I've just been slightly sick.

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